Sardar jokes

Sardar jokes

Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.



Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.



A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.. All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"



Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
Sardar: - why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....



A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide your kids, U"VE 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR



Sardar's wish: when I die, I wana die like my Grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not Screaming like all d passengers in d car he was Driving..



A Teacher lecturing on population:
"In Indi a after every 10 secs a women gives birth to a kid. "
A Sardar stands up- "We must find & stop her!. "



A man: "Sardarji, tell me, why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in the evening not in the morning?"
Sardarji: ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.



Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words.
And finds It means "U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!"

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing.
He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.



Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?
Guess what...
To avoid side effects!!!



Man: Sardarji where were U born?
Sardarji: Punjab .
Man: Which part?
Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar".



Lawyer to Sardar: "Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke....... "
Sardar :"Yeh kya, sita pe haath lagaya to court mein Bulaya. Ab fir gita pe haath!!"



A Sardar saw a beautiful girl... He went and kissed her....
Girl said- "What R U doing...?"
Sardar replied- " B.COM from Khalsa college, Chandigar"



Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me.
I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"



A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For Best Results put on Two Coats"
A sardar was drawing money from ATM,
The sardar behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****). "
The first sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, Its 1258"



Q:) How do U recognize a sardar in school or College???
A:) They are the ones who erase their notebooks when the teacher erases the blackboard.. . BOLO tarara!!



Q:) Why did the sardarji sleep with a scale?
A:) Because he wanted to measure how long he has Slept....... .



Santa Singh MBBS
After finishing his MBBS, Dr. Santa Singh starts his Own practice..
He checked his first patient's Eyes, then the tongue, and finally the Ears using a torch.
Finally he said Battery is Ok !!!

Sardar enters kitchen, opens sugar box, looks inside and closes it. This he does again and again. Why?
Because the doctor told him to check sugar regularly

Three Sardars were going on a scooter. Traffic police showed them his hand. One of the Sardars told: We are already three, sorry, there is no space

Two Sardars were in a forest, when a lion came roaring towards them. One of them throws sand into its eyes, and runs. Second one stays unmoved. When asked why he is not running, another Sardar tells: "Why should I be running? It is you who has thrown the sand "

Bank manager asks Sardar in an interview: "What is cyclone"
Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"

Once Sardar brought some tablets and started cutting the edges. Do you know why? He wanted to avoid side effects!

Bus conductor: Ticket, ticket
Sardar: Give two tickets
Conductor: Why two?
Sardar: If I lose one, another will be there
Conductor: What if you lose both?
Sardar: No problem, I have pass...

A famous Sardar's declaration to the media: "I will never marry in my life. And I will advise the same to my children too"

Teacher: Oxygen is very essential to life. It was discovered in 1773
Sardar: Thank God!! I was born after 1773. Had I born earlier, I would have died...

Interviewer: What is a skeleton?
Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting, but forgot to stop it!!

Sardarji one
Manager asked sardar at an interview.
-Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar replied: P-O-S-T-B-O-X.


Sardarji two
After returning from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife - Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me “are you a foreigner?”


Sardarji three
One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar:
Any great man born in this village?
Sardar: No sir, only small babies!!!


Sardarji four
Lecturer: Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti
So Sardar writes - Gandhi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanti.


Sardarji five
Interviewer: Just imagine you are on the third floor, and it has caught fire, so how will you escape?
Sardar: Its simple. I will stop my imagination!


Sardarji six
Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status.
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.


Sardarji seven
Sardar: I think that girl is deaf.

All ATMs in punjab are jammed & not working.
.
Bcoz,
.
.
All sardarnies put their hair pin in machine,when asked,"ENTERPIN"

Doctor:which soap u use?
santa: Bajrang soap,bajrang paste,Bajrang brush.
Dr.Is Bajrang an international company?
santa: No bajrang is my room Partner..

JOKES

Police: Eppadiya accident nadanthathu?
Driver: Athaan sir enakkum theriyala appo naan thoongittu irundhaen.

"LOVE" pani
"NASAMA"
Porathai Vida.!
"SIGHT"
Adichu
"SANTHOSAMA"
Irunga.!

Its my big advice for you.!

ippadikku... Best friend

Amaichar: Manna! Naatil panjam thalai "virithu" adukiruthu.
Pulikesi: Appadia! "ribbon" ai kattikondu olungaga ada sollum.
Amaichar:!!!!!!!!!!!?????

One day sardarji buy a kaadhal  flim vcd and he kept in fridge you know why?
Because sardar wants to see  jillunu oru kadhal  film

Josiar: unga thosam nivarthi aganumna 36 vayasu ponna kalyanam pannanum
Sardar:Rendu 18 vayasu ponnungala katikalama
Josiar: �����.?!???????

1000, 2000 selavu panni OOTY, KODAIKANAL suthana TOUR NU solranga.
10p selavu illama OORA suthana THANDASORU nu solranga
Enna ulagamba

Doctor: Mrs. Taniya good news for you!
Girl: What do you mean Mrs. Taniya? Iam Miss Taniya!
Doctor: Oh !! Sorry Miss Taniya...Bad news for you!